03/17/2017 at 06:09PM
a green penised PeePee McFarts and a beer braised Sandy Sausage
St. Patrick’s Day has once again fallen on the same day as the anal running of the Boulder Hash House Harrier’s Green Dress Run. It’s almost like we planned this shit.
Don your most ill-fitting green dress and come frolic in the mountains with your favorite pack of drunks. We’ll hit some bars and we’ll hit some trails and then we’ll hit Beano’s mom, from behind, with our penises and/or strapons and/or whatever else people are into having sex with people with these days.
Cum and have fun with us or stay home and play with yourselves while you watch gingers fuck in St Patrick’s Day themed pornos. Those are your choices. Cum exercise your legs, liver, and genitalia with the Boulder Hash. It’s the right thing to do.
An ID, hash cash, a green dress of some kind (or at least something green that covers your genitals for some portion of trail), cash for the on-after bars, a taste for Guinness, your green butt plug, and your abused liver.
No dogs/kids. We’ll be in and out of bars and green pubed vaginas all night.
This is the first run in a weekend’s worth of Green Dress Runs spread all across the Front Range. For the patch whores, shiny new patches will be available at $4 a pop. Dates for all of the GDR hashes:
Wed 3/15: HuHa (Denver). Thur 3/16: Kimchi (ColoSprings). Fri 3/17: Boulder (That’s US!). Sat 3/18: Denver. Sun 3/19: Fort Collins and Flatlanders. Mon 3/20: DIM (ColoSprings).
A – A’
This is the only Irish Bar in Boulder. It’s at Pearl St and 13th St. I believe in you. You will figure it out. I expect that it will be a huge shitshow later in the evening, but we’re starting our night out here. Finish will be within a half mile of start. Parking will be a mess, but the garage at 15th St and Walnut might be a good route if you’d like to leave your car overnight.